Chickens Quotes

A good egg…Just a little cracked. ~~~ A whistling girl and a crowing hen are both going to come to no good end. The chicken came first—God would look silly sitting on an egg. ~~~ An egg a day the hen must lay to keep the stew pot far away. It’s not natural for a … [Read more…]

Funny Divorce Quotes

Breaking up is like underwear. You feel better after the creep is gone. ~~~ Ex-wife For Sale… Just take over payments !! ~~~ I divorced my husband for religious reasons… He thought he was God…I didn’t ! ~~~ Is alimony the high cost of leaving ? ~~~ I’m an excellent housekeeper. Every time I get … [Read more…]

Diving Quotes

Approach school zones as the students do……”slowly”…!! ~~~ Caution: I drive like you do. Advice to motorists: ~~~ Drive carefully…. cars aren’t the only things that can be recalled by their maker ! ~~~ Drive it …like you “stole” it !!! Drive NOW…talk later !! Get in…Sit down….Hold on….Shut up !! Give a woman an … [Read more…]

Football Quotes

Football is like life, it requires perseverance, self denial, hard work, sacrifice, dedication and respect for authority. (Vince Lombardi) ~~~ * Hard nose…smash mouth…football !!!!! (I heard this saying at my son’s football practice) ~~~ I would love to play football; who wouldn’t want to tackle those boys ! (sent in by a young girl-who … [Read more…]

Farm & Farmers Quotes

Funny Farmer, Farm Quotes & Sayings with Phrases A DEERE grandma lives here. (you could use “grandpa” also) A DEERE couple live here. A Hard Row to Plow… Daddy’s Deere. (this was on a sign with a John Deere tractor in a field painted on it… sun coming up in the background) Farmers are the … [Read more…]

Drom Room Quotes

College is a fountain of knowledge where students come to drink !! “We also have safeguards. Any time we go into a dorm room ? our maintenance employees go in two at a time.” ~ Bob Wright There’s no place like my dorm room * Call your Mother…!! * Where’s Mom Now that I need … [Read more…]

Funny Women Quotes

A beautiful woman is a paradise to the eyes and a curse to the purse. ~~~ A career woman has to look like a LADY, act like MAN and work like a DOG !! ~~~ * A man of quality is never threatened by a woman of equality. ~~~ ~NEW !!~ A woman always has … [Read more…]

Weaving Quotes

Fiber artists dye laughing…! ~~~ Fiber artists use fuzzy logic ! ~~~ Handspinners are twisted… ~~~ Handspinners put their own twist on things… ~~~ Just another fiber artist, bobbin and weavin’… ~~~ Look at the weaver, looming in the corner !! ~~~ Look Ma !! She’s making wool !! ~~~ No, the sheep makes the … [Read more…]

Gingerbread Quotes

A little sugar, a lot of spice, A woman shaped him … Oh so Nice, He’s made of dough, and golden tan, The closest thing to a perfect man. ~~~ Come sit at my table and share with me, Warm gingerbread cookies and cinnamon tea. ~~~ Fashioned in love was this special gift, simply to … [Read more…]

Funny Hunting Quotes

A hunter will do anything for a buck ! ~~~ New ! Early to bed. Early to rise. Hunt all day. Make up lies. ~~~ Future Hunter (This would be cute for a sign for a “future hunter”) ~~~ Gone huntin’….be back at dark thirty !!! Gone huntin’….Lookin’ for Old Tom (this is a sign … [Read more…]