Danny (Rob Lowe): Oh, you’re not leavin’ are ya?
Joan (Elizabeth Perkins): No, uh we’re walking in backwards.
Bernie (Jim Belushi): The broad from last night, huh?
Danny: Oh, yeah I pick up the phone to make a call and she’s on the line.
Bernie: Yeah right, pull this leg and it plays jingle bells.
Bernie: What do you do?
Bernie: Well, yeah for a living?
Joan: I’m a neurosurgeon, you?
Bernie: Um, I’m a professional boxer. Do you know much about the fight game?
Bernie: I’m the heavyweight champion of the world.
Joan: Well, it’s nice to meet you champ.
Bernie: Interesting broad where’d she develop her personality? A car crash?
Debbie (Demi Moore): Are you gonna sit down?
Bernie: Shoot, no…no, no, no, no, I’m gonna let you guys do what you guys gotta do.Don’t worry about me, I’m just gonna go home make a little macaroni and cheese, seal the windows, and turn on the gas.
Joan: Look, if he forgets to call one day, no big deal; two days, it’s an oversight. Honey,he hasn’t called you in three days; he’s sleeping with somebody else.
Steve: I thought we had something kind of special.
Debbie: No, it was kind of sleazy and now its, its kinda over.
Danny: Now if you could find it in your heart to take this thing and shove it up your ass.
Joan: Ah, that is very telling. On your instruction, I am supposed to rend and torture myself anally.
Danny: I never fooled around, not once.
Debbie (Demi Moore): Well, let’s just give the boy a medal. Forgive me. I didn’t realize it was such a sacrifice!
Joan (Elizabeth Perkins): And you are a psychopathic, schizophrenic, maladjusted social misfit who is clearly in the middle of a very deep homosexual panic.