Beauty is all very well at first sight; but whoever looks at it when it has been in the house three days? ”
“Chess is a foolish expedient for making idle people believe they are doing something very clever when they are only wasting their time”
“Dying is a troublesome business: there is pain to be suffered, and it wrings one’s heart; but death is a splendid thing –a warfare accomplished, a beginning all over again, a triumph. You can always see that in their faces. ”
“Every man over forty is a scoundrel”
“Hatred is the coward’s revenge for being intimidated”
“I often quote myself. It adds spice to my conversation. ”
“I want to be all used up when I die.”
“In Heaven an angel is nobody in particular”
“Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when people laugh”
“Life is a disease; and the only difference between one man and another is the stage of the disease at which he lives. You are always at the crisis: I am always in the convalescent stage”
“Life is no brief candle to me. It is a sort of splendid torch which I have got a hold of for the moment, and I want to make it burn as brightly as possible before handing it on to future generations”
“Life levels all men. Death reveals the eminent.”
“Sister, you’re trying to keep me alive as an old curiosity, but I’m done, I’m finished, I’m going to die.”
“Some men see things as they are and ask why. ”
“The only man I know who behaves sensibly is my tailor; he takes my measurements anew each time he sees me. The rest go on with their old measurements and expect me to fit them. ”
“When I was a young man I observed that nine out of ten things I did were failures. I didn’t want to be a failure, so I did ten times more work.”
“Youth is wasted on the young”